Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a computer for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ****** appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but we face this problem only in password field. We checked with hardware vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard. Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****. I request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password is.

2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the 'shut down ' button.
3. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request you to check this.

4. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friend clicked 'run ' has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so that we can click that by sitting.

5. One doubt is that any 're-scooter' available in system? As I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.

6. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ' find', but unable to trace. Is it a bug??

7. Every night I am not sleeping as I have to protect my 'mouse' from CAT, So I suggest u to provide one DOG to kill that cat.

8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning 'HEARTS' (playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to collect ur money.

9. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when u will provide that?

Best regards,
Banta Singh

Baniya gave matrimonial ad for his daughter, working at a call centre:

"Wanted a suitable match for Chandigarh's highest paid call girl"



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Girl: Xcuse me brother, that's my seat.

Boy: OK! But I'm not ur brother, my father never f#*ked ur mom.

Girl: True, but my father did ! :)



~~~~~~~~~



WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:

Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.
Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?
Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!



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Patient: Nurse, I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes.

Nurse: Have you seen a doctor?

Patient: No, just spots.



~~~~~~~~~z

"Mom... don't you feel you need to think ahead of what will
happen in the future? Why don't we make arrangements about
when... you know, when you pass on?"

John's mother didn't say anything, just sat there staring
ahead.

"I mean, Mom, like... how do you want to finally go? Do you
want to be buried? Cremated?"

There was yet another long pause. Then his mother looked up
and said, "Son, why don't you surprise me?"

How does a cricket commentrator describe a nude girl?

There is no cover, no extra cover, no slip, 2 silly points & 2 fine legs, a deep gully... and little grass on the pitch bit wet after overnight rain. Any way it's going to be a fine batting pitch. Good for googlies and better for finger spin....

A prostitute goes to a school for a job

Principal: Can u teach zoology/biology/geology or physiology?

Prostitute: No. Only DALOGY & NIKALOGY

Ladki aur chai mein hamesha 6 qualities honi chahiye:

Garam ho, Tez ho, Meethi ho, Doodh jyada ho, 5 minute mein taiyyar ho, and Raat bhar sone na de

Bania to petrolpumpwala: Your scheme 'Free S#x with Petrol' is a fraud.

Pumpwala: It's not fraud sir. Ask ur wife, she has already won 9 times

A young blonde goes to the doc 4 a physical.

The doctor puts his stethoscope up to the gal's chest & says: Big breaths.

The girl replies: Yeth & I'm not even 16