Joe was a not too smart kind of guy. Everyday when he walked home from
work, he would get stopped by three nasty men and they would beat him
up and steal his money.

Finally, Joe decided that it would serve his best interest to walk a
different route and then take up some self-defense classes so this
wouldn't happen again.
He joined a karate class and soon was doing very well to defend himself.

So, one day, on the way home from work Joe took his old route home and
sure enough there they were.

He walked up to them and the battle ensued.
The next afternoon Joe went to his karate class with a black eye, a
broken nose and a busted lip.

His instructor, shocked, asked him what happened.

"Well," explained Joe, "I took my old way home last night so I could
beat these guys up who were stealing my money, but they beat me up
before I could get my shoes and socks off!"

One evening a preschooler named Krystal and her parents were
sitting on the couch chatting.

"Daddy, you're the boss of the house, right?" she asked.

Her father confidently replied, "Yes, I am."

But Krystal quickly burst his bubble when she added "Cause
Mommy put you in charge, huh Daddy?"