Two men were talking. First: I got married coz I was tired of eating out, cleaning the house n doing laundry.
Second: Amazing, I took divorce for the same reason!
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Teacher: Who is Mahatma Gandhi?
Modern day Student: He is the one who helped Munna Bhai to impress his Girlfriend!
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it's a fact: A girl may not help u to get lot of salary but... salary may help u to get lot of girls. So, love ur work not girls!
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Newly divorced woman explaining reason for splitting: We had religious differences - he thought he was God, I didn't.
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What makes some people dearest is NOT just the happiness that you feel when you meet them; but it's the pain you feel when you miss them...
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Buffalo par baithe ek jaat koTRAFFIC police ne rok k puchha: Aap ka helmet kahan hai? Fine lagega.
Jaat: Re baawale, dhayan se dekh Neeche, 4 wheeler hai !
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An Englishman and Banta inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Banta: Gud evening, we open the zip and do.